I would say your affair turned into a full blown relationship
I made the mistake of cheating on my wife of 8 years. We had three kids together, and I didn’t know it at the time but she really struggled with post partum. She was not emotionally available, for years… wouldn’t hug, or kiss me. When I brought up the issues she just said she was exhausted and I could never understand. I suggested counseling but she could never find time. I started a sexual relationship that lasted for 2 years until her husband found out and shared it with the world. I was in some kind of mind fuzz the entire time. I thought my wife didn’t really care, and didn’t have any interest in a better marriage. I was so wrong… we are 4 months in and we have both read almost every book we can find. Podcasts every single day as well as the bible every morning. She can not escape the pain I have caused her. She is dedicated to staying married, but can’t find joy anywhere. The trauma caused PTSD, sometimes she can’t remember what happened the previous day. Continue reading I destroyed her, and the truth is I always loved her, and always considered her my dream girl